Korda have a bit of a reputation for coming up with products ‘just for the sake of it’ – people, I would like to introduce to you the Korda Keyring.
Though no-one can criticise the way the Korda machine has grown, Danny himself is raking in just under £280k a year in salaries not to mention a large part of the £1.7m profit made last year. They have developed and sucked up a huge part of the market but what we can do is have a little laugh at their expense, just because we can really.
So we have saved their marketing department some time and developed 3 new ideas for products that all make as much sense as the last 3.
First up the Korda Kondom.
The Korda Kondom cum’s complete in varying shades of green and a special edition camou version for those times you don’t want to be spotted.
With an ingenious discreet ‘DF device’ these are guaranteed to see the goo cover your target in double quick time.
Because of popular customer-demand we are knocking these out in 3 different sizes, small, x small and short shank.
Introducing the Korda Instant Karper Kit
The new Instant Karper Kit is designed with one goal, to katch anyone who buys it a 40lb Karp within minutes of turning up to Linear.
Including as many products with ‘DF’ in the name as possible, this Kit is purpose designed with the new ‘overnight’ Karp angler in mind.
Kan’t be fucked to learn about fish kare? Kan’t be fucked to learn fishing the from the start? The Korda Instant Karper Kit is perfect for you.
Available form only £4999.99, you get 2 rods, 2 reels, 2 alarms and everything else you need to katch a new British record.
Lastly, the all new Korda Kaddy
Fed up of pre-baiting? aching from carrying your own tackle to the first swim off the car park? or bored of casting that spod 100 times as soon as you arrive at the lake?
The Korda Kaddy will do it all for you.
The Kaddy is a new service direct from the people who brought you Korda-Kover, the same product you can get for half the price with your home insurance provider, it’s an all singing, all dancing and all sucking personal assistant who will do everything you want on the bank.
Want to bait up your swim or reserve it 3 days before you arrive? Sorted.
Want someone else to set up your rigs, cast them and play the fish for you? Sorted.
All you have to do is sit back with a beer, stir your munga and hold the fish while your Kaddy takes the perfect shots for your piece in the mags.
Here’s a pic of one of our Kaddies, this is Dovey’s little brother…